tips to writing a maid of honor speech

A Step-by-Step Guide to Nailing Your Maid of Honor Speech

• Chapelle writes articles for The Knot Worldwide. She covers all things wedding-related and has a personal interest in covering celebrity engagements and fashion.
• Before joining The Knot Worldwide, Chapelle was an editorial intern for Subvrt Magazine.
• Chapelle has a degree in English writing from Loyola University New Orleans.

As a wedding party member, you'll likely be asked to speak at the wedding. In fact, giving a maid of honor speech is one of the most important maid of honor duties to complete on the big day. You may be a gifted orator, which means writing (and giving) a speech will be a breeze. But if the thought of speaking in front of a crowd makes you a little nervous, don't panic. With the help of Heidi Ellert-McDermott, professional speech writer and founder of Speechy , we've provided you with everything you need to know about the matron of honor speech. Learn what to say, how to say it and exactly how to get rid of any nervous butterflies. Use these tips, template, outline and more to write a perfect maid of honor speech that'll bring the house down.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Maid of Honor Speech Template

For those looking for a quick and simple reminder of how to write a maid of honor speech, bookmark this template. You could even save it as your phone or laptop wallpaper while you're writing to keep you on task.

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech Outline

So, how do you write a matron of honor speech? It helps, but you don't need to be a professional speechwriter to write a special toast for the newlyweds. Use this guide to create a heartfelt message that'll make everyone laugh, cry or both.

1. Reflect on your relationship with the couple.

Think about your relationships with each person in the couple. This is your time to write down any personal moments you shared with them. These moments can bring some tears or laughs, but they show the wedding guests how you know the happy couple. Maybe you and one of the newlyweds went on an epic trip to Europe together. Or you and the newlyweds have known each other since high school and have plenty of silly and embarrassing stories from that time. No matter which memory you choose for your maid of honor speech, pick your favorite (appropriate) story and have fun with it.

2. Celebrate the couple's relationship.

Another part of your matron of honor speech should be dedicated to the couple's relationship. You can talk about when they first met, when you knew they were in love, or how you knew they were meant to be. If some details are a little fuzzy, talk with the other honor attendants or close friends of the couple to help refresh your memory. Overall, you want to paint a picture of how the couple was when they first met, how they've grown together and why they complement one another.

3. Avoid taboo topics.

There are certain topics you shouldn't have in your maid of honor speech. It doesn't matter how you try to deliver it. These taboo subjects are liable to offend someone:

• Negativity about marriage in general.
• Past relationships.
• Previous marriages/divorces.
• Drinking, drugs, gambling.
• "Adult" humor or any other mention of sex.

Remember, you don't want to cause any drama. Keep the focus of your speech on uplifting the happy couple and celebrating their love for one another.

4. Add jokes—but not too many.

Feel like you have a comedic gift? Consider adding some jokes, one-liners or funny marriage quotes to your maid of honor speech. Ensure you don't use any inside jokes or references only you and the newlyweds would understand. Your speech should be something every wedding guest can appreciate and laugh at. This also means your jokes shouldn't be too harsh or bring up any taboo wedding speech topics we previously listed.

Be deliberate about where you put your jokes and spread them out. You want them to add comedic relief to a sentimental toast, not seem like a stand-up routine. Start your speech with a funny opening line so the guests can laugh and get an idea of what kind of person you are—plus, laughs give you time to overcome any nerves you might have.

5. Create your maid of honor speech outline.

Get creative and personalize your maid of honor speech as much as you want. A customized script is much more endearing for guests. But when it comes down to it, a great wedding toast will include the following remarks:

• Start with an introduction—along with an explanation about your connection to the happy couple.
• Next, give a word of thanks to the couple for inviting you to be part of their special day.
• Say one or two personal anecdotes, like a favorite memory, joke or sweet sentiment that most guests will understand.
• Provide encouraging advice or a thoughtful quote about the newlyweds' future.
• Finish with a closing remark and an invitation for guests to raise their glasses.

Maid of Honor Speech Examples

Need more than a maid of honor speech template to help you? Then choose your favorite sample maid of honor speech below and use it to help get your creative juices flowing.

Funny Maid of Honor Speech

Hello! For those of you who haven't had the chance to meet me yet, my name is [Your Name]. [Newlywed's Name] and I have been best friends since high school, which means we've been on each other's top eight friends list for a while. That's for my old Myspace users out there.

Typically, public speaking makes me beyond nervous, but I knew I had to make a speech for one of the most important people in my life. I've known [Newlywed's Name] for a long time and have appreciated every special moment we've shared over the years. [Newlywed's Name] has a beautiful soul, and I'm so happy that [Newlywed's Name] has found someone who complements it.

As everyone probably knows [Newlywed's Name] isn't a shy person, so the fact that [Newlywed's Name] would always giggle and blush whenever referring to 'the hot coworker' and I knew something special was going to come out of it. I've gotten to know [Spouse's Name] really well over the years, and I can honestly say [Spouse's Name] is one of the most genuine and caring people I've ever met.

Everyone aims to find their one true love, their soulmate, the person that's going to love and cherish them for the rest of their lives. And that moment came for [Newlywed's Name]...when they met me 18 years ago. But in all seriousness, I wish you and [Spouse's Name] a long and wonderful marriage. Congrats to you both, and I hope you find a lifetime of happiness together. Cheers!

Find your kind of venue

Maid of honor speech for best friend.

Good evening everyone! I thought the most nerve-wracking part of being a maid of honor was giving the speech, but fixing [Newlywed's Name] shoe malfunction before the wedding ceremony is high on the list.

I think I've calmed down by now, so I'll continue. My name is [Your Name], and I've known [Newlywed's Name] since college. We sat next to each other one time in an eight A.M. Spanish class and have been inseparable ever since. We've known each other for so long I would consider us siblings now, and I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful person in my life.

[Spouse's Name] is charming, intelligent, thoughtful and to quote [Newlywed's Name] after their first date, 'sooo cuteee.' I consider myself a top-notch wingwoman and matchmaker, but even I couldn't have picked a better person for [Newlywed's Name] to fall in love with. Anyone can take one look at them together and see that they're a perfect example of 'meant to be.'

I'm honored that you both have not only chosen me to be a significant part of your big day but also a significant person in your lives. I'm excited to watch you two enjoy this new chapter in your lives as a married couple. I love you both so much!

Maid of Honor Speech for Sister

Hello everyone! If you couldn't tell already from our almost identical faces, I'm [Bride's Name] sister. We're only two years apart, so we've always been really close. We would do everything together, like that one time we got gum stuck in our hair on the same day and spent hours combing peanut butter into each other's hair to help get the gum out. Unfortunately, this didn't work out, and we had to chop a lot of hair off.

Regardless of all the trouble we've got ourselves into, I can't imagine sharing such fun memories with anyone else. I've always looked up to [Bride's Name] and continue to think of her as a great role model to me and many others. I feel so happy and proud to call [Bride's Name] my sister.

[Spouse's Name], you've come into our lives seamlessly, and I've never seen my sister happier. You're such a funny and loving person, and to this day, every time my sister talks about you, she gets giddy. I really do think you guys are perfect for one another, and I can't wait to see how you grow even more as life partners.

Everyone raise your glass to congratulate [Bride's Name] and [Spouse's Name]. May each day be full of love and laughter!

Maid of Honor Speech for Cousin

Shout out to Ellert-McDermott for writing the passionate maid of honor speech below.

Ladies and gentlemen, friends and family and all you lucky souls who scored an invite to the wedding of the century. My name is [Your Name], and I have the pleasure of being the maid of honor today, or as I like to call it, the 'official party planner, the emergency dress fixer and human tissue dispenser.'

You all know [Bride's Name] as this gorgeous, successful, brilliant person you see before you today, but I know her as my little cousin. And I don't care how many promotions she gets, how many exotic countries she visits or how married she gets, that's who she'll always be to me. Yes, the girl who, for several years, ate nothing but chicken nugget sandwiches and had a special tree she liked to wee behind when we visited Grandma.

Being the only girls in our tribe of siblings, we quickly became best friends and partners in crime. We loved playing dress-up, but rather than pretending to marry our Prince Charmings, we'd pretend to be lawyers or scientists. And we wonder why no one wanted to hang out with us.

Our geekiness lasted well into our teens and developed into a mild addiction to One Direction, "Glee" and astronomy. We'd spend hours staring into our telescopes, wondering what we would say when we became the first astronauts to land on Mars. Sadly, that dream never came to fruition, but [Bride's Name], as we all know, did become a lawyer—an incredibly successful one at that.

But seriously, watching [Bride's Name] achieve her dreams has been a delight because she's quite simply one of life's special people. I feel incredibly lucky to have been blessed with such a fun-loving, wise and caring cousin––a special type of friend who's duty-bond to be in my life forever.

I always knew that [Bride's Name] deserved to be loved by someone special, and I'm delighted to say that person is [Newlywed's Name]. I've had the privilege of getting to know [Newlywed's Name] well over the last three years, and I must say, you're a brave soul for marrying into our family and having to cope with our crazy Christmas traditions. But I think you've figured out our secret. The louder we are, the more we like you. And just to clarify, we like you very much.

You have a kind heart, a wonderful wit and you're willing to dance to One Direction after we've had a few beers. I can also see how much you love my cousin. I can see that you 'get her;' that you know just how she likes her coffee, that you understand her sarcasm is a sign of affection and that you appreciate how intelligent she is even if she insists on watching "Selling Sunset" at every opportunity she can.

You're an incredible couple, and I've no doubt your love will continue to grow with every passing day. As your maid of honor, I couldn't be happier for you, and I look forward to sharing more happy memories with you guys in the future. And with that, everyone please join me in a toast to the happy couple and a life filled with love and laughter.

Short Maid of Honor Speech

I would like to quote the famous American author, Mark Twain, who once said, 'To get the full value of joy, you must have someone to divide it with.' This perfectly explains why [Newlywed's Name] and [Spouse's Name] have always radiated so much joy since they've met each other.

I do not doubt [Newlywed's Name] has found the person they will spend the rest of their life with. You both make a beautiful couple and may you continue to get the full value of joy out of life with one another.

Congratulations, [Newlywed's Name] and [Spouse's Name]!

Maid of Honor Speech Tips

Completing your matron of honor speech is a big accomplishment, but the work doesn't stop when you write the closing line. The right delivery is what makes it. Here are confidence tips for your maid of honor speech and other speaking engagements.

Don't procrastinate.

We recommend you start writing your maid of honor speech at least two months before the wedding day. As an honor attendant, you're expected to attend and plan numerous prewedding events, like dress fittings, the bach party and the rehearsal dinner , which means you won't have much time to write as the wedding day approaches. Also, it doesn't hurt to write a few drafts and ask someone you trust to edit your work. By preparing in advance, you'll be able to focus on writing a toast you're excited to read in front of a crowd and not have to worry about leaving a wedding event early so you can go home and write.

Add stories, not adjectives.

"Adjectives are just white noise in wedding speeches. Describing the newlywed as 'kind,' 'fun' or 'beautiful' is nice but doesn't really add much. Illustrate their characteristics and qualities by sharing the evidence of them in action," Ellert-McDermott, author of "The Modern Couple's Guide to Wedding Speeches," says.

Be true to yourself.

This is the time to open your heart and share a few favorite memories or silly stories that capture your relationship with the newlyweds. So don't feel pressured to write a maid of honor speech that sounds overly professional. A great maid of honor toast is about speaking honestly and naturally, so write how you generally speak. Don't forget this isn't the time to use inappropriate language since you'll be speaking to the couple's nearest and dearest. Your writing should feel like a natural extension of the way you talk. A genuine speech from the heart is impactful.

Remember to mention the partner.

"Yes, the focus of your speech is your friend and your relationship with them, but don't forget what the day's actually about. Try to make your tribute to their partner seem like more than a cliched afterthought," Ellert-McDermott advises.

Write it down.

Yes, you're expected to make an amazing speech, but that doesn't mean you must memorize it. Writing the entire speech word for word or just jotting down bullet points of your speech's outline can work wonders for your confidence. We suggest you read your maid of honor speech on index cards instead of reading it off your cell phone. Phones are more convenient, but the phone screen light that washes over your face as you're reading your speech distorts wedding photographs. To avoid ruining any wedding images, write your speech down instead. ( Psst. People say handwritten notes boost brain activity and optimize memory.)

Practice in front of an audience.

Practicing your speech is just as important as writing it. As with any public speaking gig, you'll become more comfortable with the material as you practice it. Read your toast aloud a few times to catch any spelling or grammar errors. This will also help you find a rhythm—you'll know exactly when you want to pause for reactions and emphasize certain points, which is key for staying within a designated time frame. You can also read your words to another wedding party member for feedback. When the time comes to stand up in front of the crowd, you'll be grateful for the pre-performance audience.

Stay calm, cool and collected.

Whether this is your first time giving a wedding speech or you're a pro, it's normal to feel a little nervous beforehand. Take a few deep breaths to calm your nerves and collect your thoughts. Speak slowly and clearly, and remind yourself that guests are excited to hear what you're saying. As nerve-wracking as it might feel to give a big speech at your loved one's wedding, their heartfelt reaction to your words will make your efforts worth it. As soon as your speech is over, you'll be free to celebrate with the newlyweds and the rest of the wedding party.

Don't forget to smile.

"Because they're nervous, speakers often forget to smile as they deliver their speech, but it's a simple and effective way to create a good vibe in the room. A smile is literally infectious, so make sure it looks like you're actually enjoying your time on the mic," Ellert-McDermott says. Putting on a soft smile also helps the photographer capture stunning pictures of you killing your speech.

Maid of Honor Speech Frequently Asked Questions

Delivering a unique maid of honor speech can seem daunting, but we're here to help you take the stress out of it. Here are answers to common questions regarding the maid of honor speech.

Does the maid of honor have to give a speech?

It's expected for a maid of honor to give a speech, especially if the other honor attendants are planning on giving one, but it's not required. Giving a maid of honor speech can be a fun experience, but it isn't for everyone. If public speaking makes you nervous, you can express yourself in other ways, like through song, dance or by creating a sweet love story presentation about the happy couple.

How long should a maid of honor speech be?

In addition to the matron of honor speech, there might also be a best man speech , toasts from the couple's parents or even a thank-you message from the newlyweds. Since there are several speeches to fit in with meal courses, dancing, games and additional reception activities , keep your salutations short and sweet. Aim to make your maid of honor speech a minimum of four minutes and at most six minutes—Ellert-McDermott suggests anything between 700 and 1000 words.

Wedding guests will be excited to hear your well-wishes and funny stories, but a long MOH speech can lose the wedding guests' interest (especially if it's full of too many personal inside jokes). A four-minute speech gives you enough time to speak about the couple's love story, offer a personal anecdote or two and finish with encouragement for married life.

How to Start a Maid of Honor Speech

"Like every other speaker, the maid of honor should say a quick hello and introduce themselves to the guests. They should explain how they know the bride and try to add some humor early on too. Tailor your speech to suit the style of the wedding. Is it a rock n roll affair or a traditional bash with children present? Consider your audience and decide if 'ladies and gentlemen' is necessary or overly formal (generally, it's the latter)," Ellert-McDermott notes.

How to End a Maid of Honor Speech

"Towards the end of the speech, the maid of honor should reiterate their joy in seeing their friend getting married. They may refer back to special memories they share with the bride and explain why she is such a great friend to them. The final few lines should be about wishing the couple well in their future life together and proposing a toast to them both," Ellert-McDermott suggests. Here is an example of a personal maid of honor toast ending from Ellert-McDermott:

Here's to a lifetime of drinking mojitos and dancing on tables. To Sophie and Taylor.

When does the maid of honor give a speech?

If the couple is following the traditional wedding speech order , the maid of honor gives her speech after the newlyweds' parents. Typically, following the maid of honor is the best man. That wedding speech order isn't for everyone since a couple's wedding party size and reception timeline impact the order too. Also, sometimes couples opt to have all the wedding speeches delivered during the rehearsal dinner. So check with the to-be-weds about the order to confirm your spot in the toast lineup.

What to do if there are multiple maids of honor?

If you are one of the multiple maids of honor , you and the others should keep your maid of honor speeches to three to five minutes long. Before delivering your speeches, we suggest you and the other maids of honor go over them together to make sure they aren't too similar (and if they are, to adjust accordingly). If you and the other maids of honor have a close relationship, want to create only one speech or you don't want to give your speech alone, consider doing a joint maid of honor speech. By doing a combined speech, you have more opportunities to be creative, like setting each other up for jokes or performing a heartfelt song together.

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech—Template Included

Wondering how to write a maid of honor speech? This guide covers everything you need to know and includes a template to help you get started.

Last updated February 5, 2024

Your best friend is getting married , and she’s asked you to be her maid of honor—one of the most meaningful and important roles in helping your best friend bring her wedding daydreams to life. With this honor comes a number of important duties, and at the top of that list is delivering the maid of honor speech.

The maid of honor speech traditionally takes place at the wedding reception , but it’s possible you might deliver it at the rehearsal dinner. Regardless of when the speech will take place, it’s best to get started writing it at least three weeks before the wedding day. After all, a meaningful maid of honor speech isn’t something you can write up on your phone the morning of the wedding—it requires some thought, preparation, and maybe a round of edits or two.

If the task of giving a moving speech to a room full of people feels a bit nerve-wracking, don’t panic. We’ve broken down everything you need to know to craft the perfect speech from start to finish, along with how to keep your nerves at bay when it comes time to deliver it.

6 Tips to Prepare for Your Maid of Honor Speech

You don’t need to be a professional writer or orator to create a meaningful maid of honor speech. Use the tips below to get an idea of what to include and get an idea of the overall structure of a solid speech.

1. Introduce Yourself and Express Thanks

Begin your speech by introducing yourself and your relationship with the bride. Then, share a word of thanks for those who had a hand in planning the wedding —the bride’s family, the groom’s family, and anyone else who you feel should be mentioned.

2. Talk About the Bride

Now it’s time to get personal about the bride and your history together. You might share an anecdote about how you two met, what her friendship has meant to you over the years, or any other endearing story that illustrates why she’s so special. It’s best to focus this section of the speech on the bride before her partner came into the picture, which you can lead into in the next section.

3. Talk About Her Partner

Now is a good time to discuss the bride’s spouse. While you’re certainly the designated right-hand woman to the bride, remember that the focus of a maid of honor speech should be on celebrating the couple , the beauty of their relationship and their future together as newlyweds.

When thinking about what to say about her partner, you can share any number of special sentiments that you feel illustrate who they are and what they mean to the bride. You also might decide to talk about what you love about her partner, mention their greatest characteristics, or share a story about how much he or she means to the bride.

4. Talk About the Couple

While the last section focuses on the bride’s partner as an individual, use this section to talk about who they are as a couple. If you’re close friends with both partners, you might have some special memories to share looking back on the journey of their relationship. If not, you might talk about the impact the bride’s partner has had on her and how you saw her grow as their bond grew over time. Whatever you choose to speak about, be sure to keep the focus on the beauty of their relationship.

5. Share Encouragement or Advice for the Newlyweds’ Future

As you near the end of your speech, try closing with a word of encouragement or advice for the couple and their future together as newlyweds. After all, the whole point of the maid of honor speech is to celebrate the couple! You might include an inspirational quote or poem if you feel like it fits, but be sure to keep it short and sweet to avoid a long-winded reading.

6. Closing Toast

The closing of your speech should be short and sweet—simply share a closing remark to commemorate the happy couple. Then, invite the guests to raise their glasses in a toast to the newlyweds.

How to Nail Your Maid of Honor Speech

While the steps above are helpful in nailing the structure of your speech, there are a few additional tips to keep in mind that will help you write a compelling and meaningful speech.

Set Aside Reflection Time

Before you even attempt to write your speech, it’s a good idea to carve out some time to simply think and reflect. This can help kick off the creative process and get you into the right headspace as you ideate what you might want to include. Spend this time reflecting on the memories you share with the bride, and try to pinpoint any ideas or emotions that come to mind when you think of her. This way, you come away with a road map of all the major points you want to touch on in your speech.

Define Your Objective

As you’re planning your speech, it’s helpful to define your overall objective before you dive into the nitty gritty details and stories you’ll share. Think about the goal you want your speech to accomplish: is it to make the wedding guests laugh, cry, maybe both? Is the couple known for their sense of humor? Perhaps you add some comedic flair to your speech.

If you’ve been through a lot with the bride or want to touch on some more serious memories, perhaps you craft your speech to be more emotionally moving. In the end, defining your objective will help you find the direction your speech will take.

Don’t Go Overboard with Anecdotes

If you have a ton of history with the bride, you might have a miles-long list of heartwarming stories you want to share. However, one key to a compelling speech is keeping it short and sweet. A standard maid of honor speech should only be three to four minutes long, and you don’t want to risk boring the guests or taking the focus off of the celebration. To avoid this, choose one or two must-have memories or anecdotes that you know you want to include, and nix the rest.

Develop Your Story

Along with keeping things short and sweet, another key to writing a compelling maid of honor speech is to tell it like a story. Any story worth hearing has a defined beginning, middle and end. While you’re in control of the details that fill the story, you want to ensure that every detail aligns with the main point of your speech. Whatever you talk about should clearly tie back to the overall focus of the speech, which is celebrating the bond the couple shares and wishing them well for their new future together.

Be Authentic

The bride chose you as her maid of honor for a reason, so you shouldn’t feel like you have to be anything but yourself when you give your speech. Throw off any pressure you might feel to sound a certain way if it doesn’t ring true to you and your connection with the bride. A great maid of honor speech is about speaking openly and honestly about the bride and her partner—remember to write in the same way you’d speak to avoid sounding stiff or robotic.

Practice, Don’t Memorize

If you feel like you need to memorize your speech word for word, don’t! Instead, focus on practicing your speech in the weeks leading up to the wedding day. This way, the main points will be well committed to your memory and you won’t need to memorize it line by line. However, it’s still helpful to use a bulleted list of the main points when it’s time to give your speech—this way you don’t have to worry about losing track mid-speech.

When you’re practicing your speech, make sure you’re practicing out loud so you can get a feel for the overall flow and rhythm of what you plan to say. It’s also helpful to read it aloud to a friend or the other bridesmaids to get some outside perspective on how your speech sounds and any tweaks that might help it shine.

Maid of Honor Speech Template

Your maid of honor speech should be authentic and personal, and there’s a number of directions you might choose to take your speech in. If you’re stuck on where to begin, the template below is a great starting point to give you an idea of the general structure and flow of a maid of honor speech. Fill it in with your own words to personalize it according to you and your unique relationship with the bride!

“Hello everyone, I’m [name] and [bride’s name] maid of honor. I met [bride’s name] X years ago when [how you met]. When [bride] and I became friends, it was [personal anecdote about your relationship with the bride]. I’ll never forget [personal memory between you and the bride].

When [partner’s name] came into the picture, [personal anecdote about how you met their partner]. [Partner’s name] was [personal anecdote about the partner’s characteristics or favorite memory].

Watching their relationship grow over time has been [personal sentiments about the couple’s bond. I’ll always remember how [personal anecdote about the journey of their relationship]. Ever since then, I’ve seen [bride’s name] [sentiment about the impact of the couple’s relationship].

It’s a privilege to join with you all in honoring the marriage of [bride] and [partner], and I know I speak for everyone when I say we’re thrilled to stand by your side today and support you both as you enter your new life together. If there’s one piece of advice I’d share, it’s [word of advice or encouragement for the newlyweds]. Thank you both for showing us what it means to love unconditionally. Please raise a glass to [bride] and [partner]! May you two never stop loving each other, growing together, and showing up for each other today and every day. Cheers!”

Whether this is your first wedding speech or your 20th, feelings of nervousness are normal! With some dedicated time and practice (and a few deep breaths beforehand) you’ll be more than ready to nail your maid of honor speech. All that really matters is that your words come from the heart. After all, the couple might not remember every single word you share, but they’ll always remember the love and care that went into it.

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The Ultimate Guide To Writing A Maid Of Honor Speech (Examples Included)

Being chosen as the maid of honor in a wedding is a huge honor and a huge responsibility.

To be selected shows that you are a very important person in the bride’s life and that she trusts you to help her big day go off without a hitch! 

When you first start your maid of honor duties, you’ll probably be focused on things like planning the bachelorette and making sure all the bridesmaids are organized.

However, there’s one important duty you definitely shouldn’t leave until the last minute: the maid of honor speech. 

As the maid of honor, your speech will be one of the most important aspects of the wedding reception.

Not only should it be meaningful and personal to the bride and groom, but it also needs to captivate the attention and stick in the minds of the guests. 

If you’re not sure where to start with writing the perfect maid of honor speech, don’t worry – we’ve got your back.

We’re going to walk you through the whole process, from choosing a style and subject material to writing the speech step-by-step. 

Your maid of honor speech should not only be heartfelt but also appropriate for all ages in the audience.

To help you get started, we’ve included some examples of great maid of honor speeches to inspire you and give you a better idea of what works well.

The Maid Of Honor Speech: What You Need To Know 

If you’ve been asked to be the maid of honor and to give a speech, but have absolutely no idea what a maid of honor speech is, don’t panic!

The premise of the maid of honor speech is actually fairly simple (albeit a bit nerve-wracking). 

The maid of honor usually gives a speech at the wedding reception, typically right after the meal.

The maid of honor’s speech is usually preceded by the father of the bride’s speech, or the best man’s speech. 

Your maid of honor speech is expected to last around 3-5 minutes. It can go on for up to 7 minutes, but you won’t be expected to speak for longer than this. 

During the speech, the maid of honor is usually directly addressing the newlywed couple in front of the rest of the guests.

The purpose of the speech is to congratulate the happy couple and specifically voice appreciation for the bride as well as the groom.

At the end of the speech, you’ll be expected to give a toast to the newlyweds. This is known as the maid of honor toast. 

If you’re not a naturally outgoing person or simply aren’t used to speaking in public, let alone at such an important and sentimental event, the idea of giving a maid of honor speech might be a little scary.

However, while some nerves are normal and to be expected, there’s no need to be scared.

As long as you follow the structure and guidelines set out in this article and practice your speech ahead of time, there’s no reason why it shouldn’t be a hit!

Writing The Maid Of Honor Speech 

Writing the perfect maid of honor speech comes down to knowing the correct structure as well as being aware of the things you should (and should NOT) include in the body of the speech. 

Here’s what you need to know when it comes to getting your maid of honor speech down on paper: 

The Structure 

Most maid of honor speeches follow a basic structure, which goes something like this: 

1. Introduce Yourself 

You should start by introducing yourself to the guests at the wedding.

Obviously, the bride and groom know who you are, but some of the guests might not have met you, so start by introducing yourself as the maid of honor and briefly stating your relationship to the bride. 

Remember, this speech is actually about the happy couple and not about you, so don’t be tempted to tell your whole life story here. 

2. Center The Bride 

Now that you’ve introduced yourself, it’s time to talk about the woman of the hour: the bride.

You can mention some of your favorite qualities about the bride and take this opportunity to let the guests know how you met. 

3. Express Congratulations 

Take a moment here to express how happy you are for the bride and groom and congratulate them on this incredible step in their relationship. 

4. Share About Your Relationship 

Although the maid of honor speech isn’t strictly about you, it’s clear that if you’ve been chosen as the maid of honor, you’re a special person in the bride’s life.

Therefore, talking about your relationship with the bride in the light of how she makes your life better is appropriate. 

You may have already mentioned how you met, but you can go on to talk about a funny (but wedding-appropriate!) story that brought you closer, or some moments where the bride really showed up for you. 

5. Celebrate The Couple 

Return to the couple at this point and talk about why you love their relationship and why you’re honored to be celebrating their love on this special day.

Talk about how you know the groom has enhanced the bride’s life and how you can’t wait to see what their future holds.

6. Thanks And Blessings 

Time to thank the happy couple for including you in the celebration of their love, and congratulate them once again. 

7. Raise A Toast 

To end the speech, ask the guests to raise a glass to the bride and groom – and take a drink yourself, because you’ve earned it!

Note: It’s fine to add some things to your speech at the last minute if it feels right to you.

Ideally, you should have your speech fully prepared in advance, but you may wish to include some stories or observations from the day of the wedding itself, and that’s totally fine!

A good maid of honor speech should come from the heart, so if something feels right to say in the moment and it’s appropriate for the occasion, go for it!

What NOT To Include 

We’ve covered the main things you should include in the structure of the speech, but there are also some things you should avoid including in your maid of honor speech. 

Please avoid any of the following when writing your maid of honor speech: 

1. Inside Jokes 

A personal story or two about your relationship with the bride is absolutely fine, and even encouraged in a maid of honor speech.

However, you should avoid including any inside jokes that only you and the bride will understand. 

While the bride might appreciate your use of your inside jokes, nobody else will understand and this is likely to lead to an awkward silence from the guests, which isn’t ideal. 

2. Embarrassing/Inappropriate Stories 

Again, although personal stories are fine for the most part, certain anecdotes really aren’t wedding-appropriate.

Your maid of honor speech is definitely not the time to start talking about wild college parties or that one time the bride got severe food poisoning on vacation. 

3. Clichés 

Try to avoid clichés wherever possible in your maid of honor speech. Your speech should be touching and heartfelt, but ideally, it shouldn’t be corny.

Obviously, it’s an emotional day, so it can be tempting to start talking about how love is eternal, but try to keep this to a minimum. 

4. Really Long Quotations 

If there’s a short and sweet quote that you feel summarizes either the bride’s character, your relationship with her, or the bride and groom’s relationship, there’s nothing wrong with including it. 

However, quotes that are several lines long should be avoided as they’re likely to send the guests to sleep. 

Maid Of Honor Speech Examples 

Now that we’ve covered how to structure your maid of honor speech and what you should avoid including when you’re drafting, you should be well on your way to writing an amazing speech! 

If you’re still not completely confident in your speech-writing abilities, though, here are some examples to draw inspiration from: 

Sister Edition 

“Hi everyone, I’m Emily, and I’m Sandra’s big sister. I’m so honored to be here with you all today celebrating the incredible love between Sandra and Drew.

Sandra, you’re not only my sister but my best friend. I’ve known you your whole life and you’ve always been such a shining presence in every room you walk into.

That’s why I’m so grateful to Drew for coming into your life and showing you the love that you deserve. 

You’ve been my rock through difficult times since I can remember.

I’ll never forget after grandpa died, you made us smile through our tears by sharing all your favorite memories of him.

You always manage to see the light in dark times, and that’s one of the things I love the most about you. 

I’m so happy that you and Drew found each other five years ago.

This man’s kindness, determination and loyalty make him the perfect partner for you, and I can’t wait to witness your journey continue to unfold. Congratulations to you both. 

Let’s all raise a glass to Sandra and drew – two of the best people I know!”

Best Friend Edition 

“Hello, my name is Kelly and I’m Bianca’s maid of honor. I feel very lucky to be able to call myself Bianca’s best friend, and even luckier to be a part of such a special moment in her life. 

I met Bianca in high school. We sat next to each other in math class on the first day of school in sophomore year and I just couldn’t figure out the answer to one of the problems.

I felt embarrassed, but when Bianca saw me struggling, she immediately smiled and offered to help. We’ve been best friends ever since. 

Bianca, you’re not only the reason I passed math class in high school, but the reason I am the person I am today.

No matter what, you’ve always continued to be there for me with a listening ear, a compassionate heart, and a shoulder to cry on through some of my most difficult times.

Someone so kind and special deserves an equally wonderful partner to share life with, and that’s why I couldn’t be happier today, celebrating your marriage to Ryan. 

I remember how happy and excited you were when you first met Ryan, and how overjoyed you were when he proposed.

The love between you is so powerful and I know that you’ll continue to love each other for the rest of your lives.

I wish you a long and beautiful marriage and I will love and support you both every step of the way. 

Cheers to the happy couple!”

Humor Edition 

Hey everyone, I’m Alison and I’m Lizzie’s best friend. I’ve known Lizzie ever since I can remember, so when she asked me to be her maid of honor, I was overjoyed. 

Lizzie, you’re the kindest, smartest, most hilarious woman I know, and I’m so happy you’ve found a husband who can handle your sense of humor – and your shoe collection! 

In all seriousness, Lizzie, I wish you and Noah the most incredible journey together. You’re both such amazing people and I couldn’t have asked for a better life partner for my best friend. 

When I agreed to be Lizzie’s maid of honor and started writing this speech, I made a list of all my favorite memories of us.

At first, I had 16 stories on the list, but then I took out all the ones she’d kill me if I talked about on her wedding day, and there were only 3 left.

I feel like that tells you everything you need to know about our adventures together! 

But seriously, of those 3 memories, my favorite has to be when we were 5 years old and decided to try on some of Lizzie’s mom’s makeup (sorry, Janice!)

We had no idea what we were doing and when we went downstairs to show everyone, nobody could stop laughing.

Since then, laughter has continued to be a huge part of our friendship, and I feel so lucky for that.

Lizzie, we’ve always said we were each other’s favorite people.

Since meeting Noah, I know you’ve had two favorite people in your life, and I’m honored to share that title with a great man who is perfect for you and makes you so happy.

Now, before I start ugly-crying, let’s all raise a toast to the bride and groom! Cheers! 

Frequently Asked Questions 

Does Maid Of Honor Speech Go First?

While the maid of honor speech is one of the most important events at the wedding reception, it is not the first speech given at the wedding reception.

Usually, the father of the bride speech goes first, followed by the maid of honor speech and then the best man.

Sometimes, the best man speech will precede the maid of honor speech depending on how the bride and groom prefer to structure the event.

What Is The Goal Of The Maid Of Honor Speech? 

The purpose of the maid of honor speech is ultimately to flatter and give insight into the life and character of the bride on her special day.

As a secondary goal, the maid of honor speech should aim to praise and congratulate the couple as a whole. 

How Should The Maid Of Honor Introduce Herself?

To introduce yourself as the maid of honor simply say your name and your relationship to the bride before specifying that you’re the maid of honor.

Related post: Bridal Shower Advice Cards – What To Write

Final Thoughts 

Being asked to give a speech as the maid of honor can be daunting because it’s a big responsibility, but as long as you follow our pointers and write from the heart, you should end up with a beautiful and graceful speech to honor the bride on her big day. 

Remember to congratulate and raise a toast to the couple at the end of your speech, and try to give the guests as much of a personal and genuine insight into the bride as you can while remaining respectful and avoiding clichés.

This is the key to delivering a great maid of honor speech.

PIN IT FOR LATER!

Serena & Dominic are a married couple and parents to 3 wonderful children. They plan weddings, run multiple small businesses, and curate wedding events.

By giving you everything you need to make your dream wedding attainable, you can eliminate stress, get the ‘wedding glow,’ and focus on spending this rocking day with the person you adore. Discover their podcast for more information

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How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech

A flawless maid of honor speech can't be hastily written on your phone at the reception—it takes time and a lot of practice. Here's how to write a maid of honor speech that will garner a standing ovation.

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As a maid of honor in your BFF’s upcoming wedding, you're likely pretty thrilled about all that's in store for you, from the awesome maid of honor duties , to the epic events to plan ( hey bachelorette party !) to that maid of honor speech — but it's also normal to be a bit nervous, too. As we said, the maid of honor has lots of responsibilities, which include writing and delivering the maid of honor speech. The maid of honor speech usually occurs during the wedding reception, but you might be asked to deliver it at the rehearsal dinner instead. If you’re comfortable speaking in front of a crowd or have a background in acting or performing, the maid of honor speech should be a breeze . But, considering that public speaking is a very common fear, you might be anxious . And even if giving the maid of honor speech doesn’t worry you, figuring out exactly how to write a maid of honor speech likely does. It’s an important moment for both you and the bride, and of course you want to make it special.

How do you prepare the most amazing maid of honor speech she’s ever heard and alleviate some of your anxieties? We’re here to help.

When to start writing a maid of honor speech.

Presuming you haven’t procrastinated too long, you should give yourself as much time as possible to prepare — start at least three weeks to a month before the wedding. This may seem like a lot of time to write a short maid of honor speech, but the longer you wait to write, the more stressed you’ll become.

Choose a time when you’re feeling inspired by your friendship with the bride and/or couple. If you’re feeling extra sentimental after the bachelorette party brought up a plethora of stories you had forgotten about, write them down. Don’t underestimate the power of free writing, during which you unleash all of the thoughts and anecdotes about your bestie that cross your mind onto the page. That way, you’ll be able to see all of your feelings and memories all together at once. From there, who knows? More likely than not, you’ll discover some sort of inspiration within these reflections.

The maid of honor speech outline.

1. how to start the maid of honor speech..

First off, introduce yourself and mention your relationship with the bride, and the couple. Next, be sure you thank whomever you feel is important enough to mention, depending on the circumstances and who paid for or planned the wedding — parents, other family members, wedding party members, etc. Congrats! You have two lines of your speech out of the way.

2. Talk about the bride. 

Now things start to get more personal. If you were just going to express gratitude, it would be a toast, not a maid of honor speech. One crowd-pleasing story you might consider including is how you met the bride. If it’s not a particularly appealing or appropriate story, you might also consider a story about the two of you the really exemplifies your friendship, or a time when you knew you were going to be friends forever. If the two of you share a bond over food, maybe you could talk about that time the two of you tried (and failed) to make your own recipe from scratch. Maybe you were really frustrated at first when you were assigned to be partners in class because you didn’t think you were going to get along, but as fate would have it, you became inseparable. Get creative and get sentimental. And don’t be afraid to be funny .

3. Talk about her partner. 

After talking about you and the bride, it might be a good idea to include how you first met her almost-spouse in the maid of honor speech. I once witnessed a maid of honor that had been friends with the bride for many years, and during her speech she recalled that the bride actually had set her and the groom up on a blind date at first. The maid of honor and the future groom talked about their common friend for the entire date—and the rest was history. You’re the bride’s right hand woman, but a wedding is all about celebrating the couple, so it’s a nice transition from talking about you and the bride into talking about the bride and her partner. It also shows your solidarity and support for their relationship. No matter how you truly feel about her partner, keep a happy face on.

4. Talk about them as a couple. 

Speaking of which, after you explain how you met the bride’s new spouse, talk about the two of them as a couple. This works even better if you’ve known both of them for a long time. Maybe you were the bride’s roommate when they had their first date, and you witnessed her giddy nerves beforehand. Maybe you witnessed the very prolonged will-they-or-won’t-they period of their relationship. What did she tell you after they said "I love you," for the first time? At one wedding, the groom’s sister told a story that took place about three months before the groom and bride had gotten together. The sister was teasing her brother about his love life, when he said, “I’m in love with my best friend, but it will never happen, she’s not interested.” Her brother wouldn’t give any names — but three months later, she figured it out for herself when they started dating.

5. Keep it short and sweet.

In thinking about how to write a maid of honor speech, remember that it should only be about two to three minutes long. That’s just long enough to tell a few stories about the beloved couple and toast to a happy future. Everyone will probably be anxious to start dancing (or eating!) at this point, so there’s no need to drag on. We tend to talk more quickly when we’re nervous, so be extra aware to speak slowly. 

6. Practice.

Be sure to practice your speech in advance — whether it’s in front of a mirror, your cat, or a family member or friend. You can even time yourself to make sure the speech is an appropriate length.

7. End with a toast.

Don't forget to toast to the happy couple at the end! Raising your glass is a great natural finisher to your maid of honor speech, and a guaranteed crowd pleaser. You can add a few words, like "Now, let's all raise a glass to the newlyweds!" or something similarly concise and to the point.

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What to NOT say in a maid of honor speech

Here's what to avoid when writing your maid of honor speech.

1. Exes, drunken nights or anything else remotely inappropriate. 

It should go without saying, but exes or drunken debauchery should not be included in a maid of honor speech. A wedding is a family event, after all. Don’t talk about anything the bride wouldn’t mind her grandmother hearing. 

2. Anything that could even potentially cause tension.

Don’t mention the high divorce rate — even jokingly. It will not be received well.

3. Don’t feel pressured to be anything but yourself.

If humor isn’t your strong suit, it doesn’t have to be a hilarious maid of honor speech. You can be nostalgic, sweet, or sentimental — but not drunk. Wait to drink until after your maid of honor speech .

Whatever you write in your maid of honor speech, the most important thing is that your words come from the heart. Even if you’re not a natural-born performer , speak with feeling and emotion — not like you’re reading a classroom assignment—and talk directly to the couple, rather than focusing on the many other faces in the crowd. Your bestie may not remember the exact words you said during your maid of honor speech, but she’ll remember the care and love behind it.

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